So now let's talk about how you can learn to say no. So maybe you say yes to often, when someone asks you something, or when someone has a request, you tend to say yes to offer maybe because you want to be loved. You want to be nice. But sometimes it's important to really say no, because you have your priorities, and you have something that is important in your life. And sometimes you don't want to change your plans. So what are my six?

Best advice on how you can learn to say no. The first one is that you must define what is important and what is not. For example, someone comes to your office, and they ask you to do some extra work. So if you have your priorities, and you know that you have to deliver reports by 4pm, and someone comes and says, Hey, can you do this extra work? Right now? You should be able to say no, because what is important to me right now is to write this report for that.

For that client by 4pm. So you must decide what is important and what is not. So when someone asks you, do you want to do that? Or ask you a question? Always ask yourself this question what is important to you? If, for example, you have a family dinner, and your boss asked you to, to stay late to finish work, and what is really important to you is your family dinner, you can just tell your boss, I understand that there is a lot of work, so use empathy.

And then you say, but tonight, I have an important dinner. And for me, it's important to spend time with my family. What they can do is that I can arrive early, early tomorrow, and then I can finish the work. You know, it's always about knowing what is important to you and what is not. The second advice here is that if you don't know the answer, don't answer yet. If someone asks you a question, and you don't know if you want to say yes or no, don't answer, because If you don't know the answer, people tend to say yes.

So it's important to really if you don't know the answer, just tell the person that you need a little bit of time to think about it. This one here is the broken record technique. It means that if someone asks you a question, maybe they want to see if you are able to say no, often, and they won't try to see if they can make you change your mind. So it happened to me yesterday with a friend of mine. He wanted to invite me to a party, and I really didn't want to go because there were people that I didn't want to see there. So he said, Hey, Alan, do you want to come tomorrow to to dispatch and say, I'm sorry, but I can say I have a lot of work to do and that was true.

So I told him a story I have to work have to I have to finish this design training. And he said yes, but it will be regret. Do you want to come tomorrow say thank you for asking. But I really have a lot of Work have to finish it online training. Yeah, but no, but you know, like, it will be great. It's a great party.

Are you sure you don't want to come? You know, I have a lot of work. And it's not really the best moment right now. Thank you for asking. And he continued asking the question five times, and five times I just answer this a variation of the same answer. It's a broken record technique.

If someone comes to your office, and they asked you to do their work, because they have, they don't have time, and they would ask you, could you do that for me? You can say, Oh, I'm sorry. I have I'm busy right now. I have to do some work. The person who asked again, yes, with a shoe, it's really important for me, I really need that. So yes, sorry.

I can't I have a I have to do that for client. Yeah, but you don't understand. It's really important. Can you do that for me? Please understand that it's important for you, but I really need to get this work done. Yes, but please do it for me.

I totally understand. It's important, but I can't do that right now. You know, you continue repeating the same thing over and over again, and you have evaluation of it. But you still use empathy. It means that you understand that their situation is important. You understand that they have a lot of work.

You always use empathy with that. Don't wait for approval, when you say no, don't say no, and see if they accept the behavior. Just say, No, I'm sorry, I can't. I'm busy. I have other priorities. And when you say that, you don't wait for the approval, you just, we just state your preferences, and you let it go.

Okay? This is important. Don't explain why in detail. Because if someone asked you to say something, and then you start explaining why you can't, then we try to find a solution to help you with your objection. Let's say that you can. You can't drive them to the airport tomorrow because we have a lot of work to do.

So then you can say Yeah, that's, that's awesome. I can I can stay late today and help you with your work so that tomorrow morning, you can drive me to the airport. So give a small explanation, but not in details. Just say that you have other words you have other things to do. Or it's not a priority to you right now, or you're busy with the clients, don't give them too many too much details because then they can use that against you and try to solve the objection that that you are giving them. And when you are saying no to someone, we are rejecting the request, not the person.

When you say no to someone, you're not saying no to the person, but you're saying no to what the person asked you to do. It's a small difference here, but it's just for people who are not comfortable say no, it's that you're not saying no to someone. You're saying no to the words that they're saying. And this is a distinction here. So my challenge to you is this week, I would like you to say no to someone And use the broken record technique to define what is important to you and what is not to say it without waiting for approval. Don't explain why it is and understand that you are rejecting the request not the person.

I would like you to start applying these techniques here.