Welcome to Module Two, where we'll jump right into the first of three foundational principles around behavior that will guide our discussion over the remainder of the course. we as parents are expected to be the boss, the boss of our house, we set the rules and our children are to follow. Now, I want you to think of some common phrases you often hear from parents when we were trying to get our kids to do something maybe at the park or a restaurant or school. Now, most of them may may come out of that, that frustration. You may hear common common statements like one, two, or what about how many times do I have to tell you? Do you want Do you want a spanking?

Do you want to timeout Do you want to go right now if you do that one more time. I'm not going to tell you again. Or maybe this one, what about, what did I say? Here's the last one my favorite. No, thank you. So those statements are what children are hearing from us as adults.

They're hearing those phrases often in every day, you may use those yourself and you may see them as somewhat effective. Now, what I want you to do is imagine yourself, hearing those phrases come out of your boss. What if your boss said any of those phrases to you? No, thank you. How many times do I have to tell you? Right?

If she told you or he told you these things? How would you feel? What would you do? How would you react? That's exactly how children are feeling. They're feeling ashamed, frustrated, and they're dealing with this pent up emotion that we as adults, we can vent to our friends or our spouse now their family members, but we can do that.

Things to relieve stress. But for children, they're going to relieve that stress as tantrums as a sulking as non compliant acting out. So you may think the counting two, three is pretty effective for your kid, but at what cost your relationship? You might be thinking, Well, what else do I say? What can I do instead of to get my kid to leave the playground? What do I do?

We'll get to that, I promise. But the first step in changing our behavior is self awareness. When you're self aware of these phrases, and the way your child is hearing those phrases from us will be more willing to change our behavior. And once more self aware, then we can acquire new skills, we can then practice those skills, become become more fluent in those skills and the last step of the learning process would be master those skills to be so confident be so good consistent with our behavior, that becomes our new way of interacting or reacting to our child. So when we stop using these ineffective and combative phrases, our children may or may not be able to verbally identify, but they will notice a difference in you as a parent, pay attention will diffuse, and they'll be much more open to our positive interactions with them.

So the next set of modules, I will be giving you tools and alternatives to those worn out phrases. You won't have to repeat the same things your parents or your grandparents said or did, you can be a better parent. So please consider what life can be like with a child who wants to behave with you as the parent in the driver's seat. So here's your next homework assignment. I want you to take the next couple days just to be self aware of your own words. What are the first statements that come in your mind when you're faced with a frustrating moment with your child?

Write them down. I also want you to listen to other parents at the park at the restaurant at the library. Let's see if you hear them say any of these phrases. And take a note what happens what happens next? What's the child's reaction? You may start to see that the child you might see them in the new wire.

Rather than thinking the child needs to listen to their parent. Maybe the parent needs to communicate more effectively. Good luck with this assignment. Take your time and reflect. Remember, this is the first step. There will be much more to come.

So once you've completed this assignment, please jump to the next lesson.