Do you feel you are successful in your life? And how would you define success? And even more importantly, would you like to have more success in your life? I'm very often asking this question when I'm starting a keynote speak somewhere in the world. And obviously, everybody everywhere will always like more success. Now, the program positive impact is basically about creating success, success for you, but not only success for you at the expense of the counterpart, it's really creating success for everybody, because it is possible to generate success without having somebody generating less success.

Now, what is success? And how would we define that? Well, Dale Carnegie actually quoted that really well. So I decided just to copy his quote, and what they'll kind of be saying, as you can see is success is getting what you want, and happiness is wanting what you get. I think that's a wonderful quote, because success is obviously very different from one person to another. And happiness is something complete pletely different, and may not necessarily be based on the same thing, when we're going to talk about positive impact, and this video is all about what positive impact is all about something is very important for you to understand.

And that is, you're not supposed to be liked by everybody. So that means that you're not going to fit in with everyone. And the reason I'm saying that is that the great ones never did. So that means if you a little bit outstanding, if your unique ideas, if you separate yourself from the majority of everybody, somebody out there is just in a position where they really don't like you. They don't care for you. And they may not even want to work with you.

Don't feel bad, even though it happens a couple of times every year. I mean, obviously if it happens every day, and you come back to your colleagues and say well, the guy I made yesterday didn't really work and and the person I met today didn't really work and the one I'm going to see tomorrow probably won't work either well then you might have to stop studying yourself and see if there's anything you can change. But if you meet a couple of people every year what just doesn't work and it doesn't hit off and it does not work. To your fault, and it's not their fault either. Now, the book positive impact is a book that has been published in several countries around the world. And it's actually management book that was awarded Best Management book in Scandinavia in Europe a couple of years ago when it was published there.

And the reason is not that it's a particularly good book, I can say that since I'm the author, it's not really very brilliant, outstanding. It's not because I've been reading a lot of books out there on personal impact communication, psychology, behavioral economics, and all of that. And I've seen a lot of books I honestly feel is even better than positive impact. But I think the reason it's been nominated and been winning awards is it's kind of been gathering all the important stuff. So that means it's looking at the important stuff from psychology, from behavioral economics, from communication and from personal impact, and kind of listed in a prioritized order, the things that are most important to you. And I'm just going to give you a few of those highlights a few of those headlines.

What is really crucial. And we're going to talk about during this video, think about this quote up here, you simply cannot not communicate. Do you understand what I'm saying here, you simply cannot not communicate. Imagine you're sitting in a meeting. And obviously, that's a person that is saying something, they might even be standing up and saying something in that meeting, you might be sitting at the conference table and not saying anything, but you're still communicating. Because you might be leaning back, you might be looking out the window, you might be scratching your, your face, you might be looking down into your papers, you might be looking at text on your cell phone, that's communication as well.

And the person up there who's actually delivering a message is reading all of the people in the conference room. And that person up that delivering the message is actually reading all the people in the conference room and getting a signal back from them. So one of the key things that positive impact is going to focus on is really how to read other people, especially reading other people, when they don't think they actually communicate Because we are communicating non verbally. So that means obviously we can read a lot from people who actually don't think they aren't doing any communication at all. Now, a couple years ago, I came up with three words that I truly feel is the motivating thing for a lot of people. I actually claims that a lot of people are motivated by money, by sex appeal being attracted to other people, or by power.

And by power, I mean, the ability to be influential, the ability to convince other people and the ability to make other people agree with you. I honestly believe that most people are motivated by one by true or by all three of these quotes up here. What is funny is I have a Dutch colleague who's been working with me for more than eight years. And a couple a month ago, he came to me and he said something funny, he said, Kelly, you know what? I've been looking at your three words that you claim is the key motivational factor for people and you claim on top of that, that you You need all three of them to be successful in life. And I strongly disagree.

He said to me, and obviously I was very puzzled and curious. So I was looking at him and say, why isn't Peter that you strongly disagree? And he said, because I think you're wrong. I think you only need one of those three quotes of them, and you've got sufficient amount of that one, then you're going to get the other two automatically. Think about that for a second. I have.

And I honestly think my colleague is white. Because if you have enormous amount of money, you can absolutely convert that into sex, and power. If you have a lot of power history has shown us you can easily convert that into sex and money, and you have a really strong sex appeal. Obviously, history has shown us as well that you can turn that into money or power. So the question to you is really which one of those three Do you want to focus on? Which one do you want to develop in the future as well?

Now, one of the things that is stopping us and I've been talking about in other videos as well, is really all the things we know Already, that is really putting a limit on what we think we want to learn. Think about it, we have a tendency only to read books with the content. We agree. That means we basically as human beings only buy books by authors we like or reading content that we agree with. So we have a tendency not to buy a book that writes or describes something that we would disagree with. And obviously that is putting a limit on us gaining new knowledge.

Can we all agree that about 1000 years ago, the leading scientists and researchers and authority in our society had all dictated that the world was flat. Everybody believed that? Because that was the authorities that had dictated that. We have later learned that that is actually not the case. The earth is really not flat. 500 years ago, the leading authorities in society, the highest ranking people, the most respected of everybody said that Earth was send off the universe.

Now, can we all agree that later on we learned that's actually not the case? Earth is not send out the universe, it's actually circling around the sun. So sometimes I'm thinking what is that we today think we know because the authorities have told us that that's the case that we laid on, we'll learn. That was not the case at all. So sometimes we have to strong strongly think out of the box and open up just to have a different approach in how we're doing things. Now, look, for a second at this picture up here.

I was doing a presentation in Germany A while ago, and I was asking the audience, what is that you see on the screen right here. And that was a German business person who raised his hand and he said, that's a burger. And I said, I'm sorry, it is not. It is actually the brain. Because one of the key things we're going to focus on on positive impact is actually not only how the brain works, how we can manipulate people's brain, and how we exit can read other people's way of behavior. But we're also going to look at if anybody might have a brain damage.

And I'm half joking half serious because we can actually look into behavior to seeing somebody have a brain damage. And the reason I'm saying that is think back, if you think back to, let's say, 2004, may 28 2004. Do you remember what you did that thing to think about if I second may 20 2004. And you can just think about the time span between 10 o'clock in the morning and noon. Okay, so those just those two hours, what were you doing? May 20 2004?

I'll bet you most of you have no idea whatsoever, including myself. And you know what, that is obviously kind of natural. We don't remember that. And when I'm asking people something like this, mostly I get the answer. I have no idea what I did. But you know what's interesting, that's actually a lie, because we do know what we did in a particular time, but we just have no idea how to get That information.

Now let's assume for a second that we have actually a picture of you on May 20 2004. And here's a picture of you in front of the lake, there's a canoe and you are standing next to two of your best friends. Now, if I'm showing you this picture from May 20 2004, that you previously just said, You have no idea what you were doing. If I showed you that photo, you will probably say all that day, I remember that we were out canoeing on the leg, it was a putable date was sunshine later that day, we were barbecuing and then there was actually a hole in the canoe and it was so funny what happened in the evening is and you can keep telling and telling and telling what actually happened on that specific thing. And you know why? The reason that we can do that is because our brain works like a camera.

It doesn't work like a computer. If this was a computer, we bought it in May 20 2000. For that computer without remember that so we are asking for that information, the computer would bring back up that information, but the brain doesn't work that way. The way the brain works is that that picks up a photo. So that means it's working graphically. So when we introduce percent tell other people about something, it has to be done in a graphical manner.

Human beings are really bad at coping with a huge amount of data. But we're really good at coping with graphical impressions. When when talking about success, and as I told you earlier, positive impact is all about success, we can really divide that into 15 85%. And you might remember from some of the other videos, my 15 85% rule, but just to summarize it very quickly, what I claim is that only 15% of the reason that you are successful in your life is based on your formal education, the amount of years you've been doing, what you're doing, and the the experience of technical knowledge that you may have. I'm claiming that that's only 15% of the reason that you are successful in life. On the other hand, 85% of the reason that you are successful in life I'm claiming is true to what we call your human engineering, understanding.

And human engineering really means are you likable? Are you trustworthy, and do other people like you, with other people like to work with you. So what I'm claiming is it's way more important for you to be likable. That means having social intelligence, being good at communication and negotiation, that it's important that you actually have a formal degree along education, or even an experience in whatever you're doing. Now, obviously, I'm not stating that education experiencing technical knowledge doesn't mean anything. I never hope we end up in a world that is zero hundred, could you imagine that that wouldn't be good, because that would basically means that all of us would be very good at talking about something that we know nothing about.

So hopefully, that is not the case. But what I'm claiming is that a lot of us is actually well educated today. A lot of us have the same amount of knowledge and experience. So where we can actually make a difference today is really under human engineering, creating trust, personal positive impact, and be good at communication and negotiation. I was reading a study a while ago that actually claimed that every year, more than 2 million terabytes is being lost in the Western world that has never been released before. That's the amount of data new information loans in the Western world more than 2 million terabyte.

If someone was sitting there thinking, what is a terabyte? Well, a terabyte is a lot. And we convert all that new data never launched before in the Western world, we put that on the old fashioned CD ROM, that's about 700 megabyte of data on a traditional old fashioned CD ROM. What the scientists were claiming was that we can put that data on a CD ROM and that will actually go from Earth to the moon and back again five times. That's the amount of information launched every year. That is Never been lost before.

And just look at this. This graph we have on here that really shows the amount of data what is happening every single minute round the route around the world. And that is just been increasing all the time. So that means the amount of data we got today is just stunning, isn't it? My daughter, who is 21 is studying at university in Denmark. And I was trying to tell her a while ago that there's something called a library in the library is a big, big building that has lots and lots of books inside.

And I was halfway joking, but she has not really been visiting the library a lot. When I was studying, I was going to library almost every single day because I have to look into books because that was before something called the internet was invented. But today we got the internet, obviously. So that means she's just going online every time she needs information. But what was curious to me something to think about was that when I was studying, my challenge was to find the information. Today when she's studying, it's not the challenge about finding information is about figuring the information and getting the right information, because there's so much of it out there.

So please remember one thing, ladies and gentlemen, when you're delivering a message when you're communicating with other people, facts and figures are easily forgotten. But stories are retold. On one of my many, many trips, I had the pleasure of having a couple of hours off. So I went downtown in the city I was in and there was this farmers market, as you can see here on the screen. And I stopped at one of these booths here that was selling fruits and vegetables and downs to sign on that booth that interested me a bit because as you can see, says here, we sell cheap and good fruit. And I actually stopped thinking this is a very simple example of our communication.

Because could we all agree that we don't have to say here we sell it is kind of obvious that they are there to sell stuff, right? I don't think I would walk up This stands and asked to buy a bunch of bananas. They're saying no, you can't buy it, we only accept a showing you what kind of bananas we got. So obviously they're selling. So on this side, there's no need to tell the world we selling anything. That's all communication.

Besides that, I can see obviously, that is not tires, or our counterpart there selling is actually fruit. So there's no reason to put fruits of that as well. And you know, it's kind of funny. It's very rare that I see anybody saying we're selling bad fruit. So obviously, I guess that the fruit must be good. And I can just look at the fruit and see whether it's good or bad.

So there's no reason to put the word good up there as well. So you know what, they could have been even more successful just by having one big sign saying cheap, and the rest of it, I could automatically figure out. Now obviously, this is just a very dominant simple example. But it's just a simple example that shows us how much old communication we basically have in the world today. Look at this for a second ladies and gents And what we're seeing here is that when you and I are gathering new information, if we are having a normal site level, that means that we can actually see stuff 90% of all new information that comes in, is actually coming in through visions, back to the graphical thing and the brain. So that means we pick up information that is graphical, then we have a sensory memory system.

And that works basically just like the computer, you know, the computer when you're done in something work or Excel or PowerPoint, or whatever it translate into a language that computer understand the zeros and ones. And you know, it doesn't take any time, the same way our brain works. That means when we actually see something, it is converted into something that our brain understand. And it goes so quickly that we don't know what's happening. We don't spend any time on it. So that's the sensory memory.

And then we have a short term memory and we have a long term memory. And what is kind of interesting is that the short term memory is like the ram in a computer and when you turn off power, that memory is gone. long term memory is just like the hard disk. Unless you have a brain damage, everything that actually goes to long term memory will stay in there. What is the challenge, though is that a majority of the information that you receive in life, don't go to the long term memory, because what goes to long term memory is only what you find of interest in that certain moment. So let's say you only had a short term memory, that would mean that the expanse of the timespan for that is approximately plus minus five minutes.

So if you only had short short term memory and no long term memory, and you were looking for clean shirt in the morning before going to work, you would start looking in the bedroom, you couldn't find a clean shirt and then then you go to the kitchen, you can't find a clean shirt and then you go to the laundry room. You couldn't find a clean shirt in there. You go to the living room, you're cool, you couldn't find a clean shirt in there. And since you only have a memory span of five minutes, you will go back to the bedroom and start looking again. That will be the effect of all the Short term memory. Now what is a little bit scary is that up to 50% of all information that you're getting is simply not passed on to long term memory.

Because your brain, the computer in here will decide that is not for me. What's in it for me will simply not be utilized because the conclusion is I can't use the information for anything. So it's basically just been thrown out. So think about that as well. And the more we can actually, in a graphical manner stimulate the brain, the more that will go into long term memory. A while ago, I did a study together with Copenhagen Business School in Denmark.

And what we did was we were asking all of the Executive MBA alumni, and we were asking the top executive of the biggest public companies in Denmark, what was the most important skills for the executive of the future. And by the way, we didn't we didn't manipulate in any possible way. They were just handed a blank piece of paper and just they could write down what Given, what we saw up here was management training was actually pretty low. There was obviously other items out here, there was even no other management training. But on this top list I got right here, management training was the lowest experiencing whatever you're doing was the second lowest. And then we had family and kids.

Now when I present this slide, I very often meet people that are saying, well, that's surprising. So what you're saying is actually the Executive MBA students at CBS in Copenhagen, and the top executive of the biggest public companies in Denmark is actually saying that having family dash kids is the fourth most important for the executive of the future. The third most important one up here was market orientation. The second one was actually knowledge of own flaws. That means how can you improve yourself and number one of this list up here was actually the ability to be efficient in communicative competence. That is positive impact, how you communicate and and in a piece of information, whether you consider trustworthy And whether you are generating personal impact.

Let me just ask you another question. If I pulled up towards here personal impact is one word, another word could be manipulation. Which of the two words are positive word? Do you find that positive or personal impact is a positive word? Or do you find that manipulation is supposed to work? When I'm asking this question out in real life, the majority of everybody I'm asking is saying, well, personally, impact is a positive word.

And manipulation is actually a negative word. But what is interesting is actually manipulation means to change. And that is what we're trying to do when we negotiate and communicate, isn't it? We're going to try and change the counterpart opinion. We're going to try and change the way of thinking and we're going to try and change their understanding of what we're going to say that they would agree with us. If we go back to the 50s and the 60s when we were looking into supply and demand, it was kind of very different than what it is today because Demand is driving the market.

So that means there was less supply and a bigger demand. So it's actually pretty easy producing anything, then because you could just do it and sell it, people would buy it. Then in the 70s, marketing was actually invented, it's not really older than that. So in the 70s, competition started really to occur. So that means supply and demand changed a little bit. And you need actually to produce brochures and sales information and advertising and commercials and whatever to sell your product.

Then in the 80s, and the 90s, marketing was not enough anymore, you actually had to do corporate issue information as well. You could not only tell a story about your product, you also have to tell a story about your company. And what is really interesting when we move into today's world, information about your company is not enough anymore. product and marketing information is not enough anymore. Really today it's about reputation and trust as well. So it's really about what you're doing.

Not what you're saying you're about to do, and is really about how other people, the surrounding world, evaluating your reputation and trust, because as I just said, supply and demand, there's so much supply out there and a lesser demand. The old Greek knew this thousands and thousands of years ago, because what they basically said, as you can see up here is that we have Fs locusts and peppers. And what they're really saying is that we take the emotional part, and that is really how we react emotionally to other people. That is the biggest part of the reason that we like somebody and we want to work with somebody. What we also see out here, the locus that means fact is the second biggest one. So that means that fact is obviously important, but is not as important as the emotional side.

And the most important one appear less. The smallest level of importance of here is the credibility itself. So it's kind of interesting to see that even thousands of years ago, the great Greek thinkers were actually putting the image emotional side, that means the 85% rule in my world as the top thing that is the most important when you want to convince other people about stuff. On the on this program on this cause positive impact, one of the key things we're going to look at is actually the first impression. And the first impression comes really quickly. You know that when you step into a conference room, you see somebody for the first time you never talked to them.

You never heard about them before. You never had any kind of relationship. Do you know how long time it takes for us to conclude whether we like or we don't like, and it's not something we're very conscious about. It takes us seven seconds. In seven seconds, we have created this conclusion, I like that person might dislike that person. The key thing is we could be wrong, by the way we could change that opinion later on, but it takes a long time to change that opinion.

And you know what, within those first seven seconds, all of what I've listed up here has actually being computed up in our brain and based of all that information rereads the conclusion on positive impact, we're going to discuss how do we actually work with all these items? How can we manipulate that so we can actually enforce that other people might like and trust you quicker than if we're not focused and concerned about these items up here. UCLA in California did an interesting study years ago, where they're actually looking at the importance in the rule of communication. And you might have seen this study because it's really well known, but what they actually claiming is that only 7% of the reason that somebody would like you or trust you is based on word, the content itself 38% of the reason that anybody likes you or trust you is based on your tone of voice that means your speed variation and tone itself.

And the last thing out here that 55% is the body language. And some of you might be sitting there thinking, well, if this is true, then it's really not important what I'm saying. The only thing that is really important is how I'm saying it and you know what, that is really True. Because if you hit a new piece of music on the radio at what do you actually pay attention to the first is not the lyrics. It's actually the song. And the same thing goes when we meet another person, we have focused foremost.

And that's the first important thing on the nonverbal communication. And the nonverbal communication is obviously the body language. And it is the tone of voice. And when all of that adds up in a congruent behavior, then we start listening to the content itself. Just a wrap up, one of the many, many things that we're going to focus on on positive impact is obviously eye contact. How is that important?

How do you use that in different cultural connections, their facial expressions, and what I can tell you already now is that in the psychology world, we like to divide people in three groups, a very angry close looking facial expression, a neutral facial expression or positive open facial expression. And by the way, that doesn't necessarily signal how the real behavior and feeling might be. That's just how our muscular build up This interface, then we're going to talk about human. We're going to talk about storytelling and anecdotes. We're going to look at justice, how are we going to use our body language? And how can we use it on purpose to convert a message and convince other people we're going to use, besides look at not only our justice, but the use of feet?

Why is it a benefit? Sometimes during meetings to stand up and walk around? We're going to talk about the use of voice. And obviously, we're going to talk about image as well. That means how is your congruent look? How are you getting through?

A great thing about positive impact is that you're actually going to do presentation even though it's online. And you're going to send those recordings in and you're going to get a feedback from us. Another important thing on positive impact is that we're going to look at behavioral economics and that's basically the merger between psychology and economy. So that means we're going to look at how people actually react in different situation. And just to wrap up and give you a short introduction about what is behavioral economics. I can refer to a study that the economist did that matter marketing department that there are a bunch of really skilled people.

What did they want, they wanted obviously to sell subscriptions on the magazine. And they went out to the market with three different product offering. And product as you can see out here is where the offering the economist calm for $59 a year. And that was access to the magazine online and access to all articles since 1997. product B, as you can see is the printed version and the price was $125. And that would mean that you will get the printed edition of The Economist for you, but you would not get access to the online version. Sorry, an article since 1997.

And the third and final product offering out here wants to print it and the online version priced $125. And what they're offering out here is the printed magazine for you online access to the magazine and access to all articles since 1997. Now which of the three would you pick? I can tell you that the majority of all consumers in this case they actually Pick the last one up here. And nobody pick the middle one. Because the middle one, make no sense did it?

That makes no sense whatsoever to pick that one. And you know what's interesting, the magazine department at the economist, they knew that already. And the middle one in here was only put in there to manipulate you and I as a consumer to pick the product out here. You know what's really interesting, if you remove the middle option, and only offered the online version for $59, all the printed and online version $425. Do you know what happened then suddenly, majority of everybody would pick the online version. And obviously that would have a negative impact on the revenue and benefit of the economist.

That's how we actually manipulate in the world of behavioral economics. So just to sum up, what we're going to look at during positive impact is obviously the individual level. That means reliability, it means personal impact and emotion personal chemistry. We're going to look at facts experience. evaluation of our communication. And some of the key things as I just mentioned, we're going to focus on as well as personal empowerment, personal communication, behavioral economics, and trust.

Last slide is really what you get out of this. And one thing you're going to get is experienced from experts that have been working in this field in more than 25 years, you're going to get info and insight into the latest research you're going to do hands on, that means you're going to participate in your own presentations. You're going to get books, you're going to read a lot of papers about research as well. You're going to do communication simulations as well. You're going to watch videos, there'll be a bunch of online videos, there'll be office hours where you can contact the professors and get feedback on whatever you need and ask questions. And you will have a complete toolbox within the area of positive impact and communication.

So what can I do after I'm done with this program? Well, one thing you can do is read body language which is very useful not only in communication, but definitely negotiations as well. You are able To identify a person who may not be telling the truth online, you will also be able to manipulate your message and that basically means changing the way other people are perceiving you, you will have presentation skills you will have gained confidence in communication in general, you will have convincing skills you able to prepare for a presentation, a meeting and negotiation in a professional manner. And you will know your own communication style. And what are my goals in this case? Well your goals could be to become a better communicator.

It could be that you want to know your your false it could be that you want to eliminate stress, get a complete checklist, be trained by some of the best you can get access 24 seven to the program. You can go online all the time, through a better read people all get a structure. That was a short briefing and introduction into positive impact. We hope to see you on the course. Thank you