So let's look at exercise 11 which is on the next page. Exercise 11 is how is the universe talking to you? Your obstacles problems and blocks. So you write down your current problem or situation you get clarity on the problem of causes addressing the issues sooner than later is a breeding ground for them to be bigger problems. So what are you learning? So I would like to show some people I'd like you to come up and tell me what common elegies what common blocks you have.

And then we will read what the universe is telling you. So does anyone say you know what, I've got this issue or these people, these things keep happening. And then we'll show you how to decipher the block. This Anybody have anything? They go? Yes.

Okay, Andrew. So I'm looking at film I'm curious to Yes. I love a challenge. Good. But what's your thing? For me?

It's about reciprocation and friendships. And I hear a lot of stuff around like taking action, putting yourself out there. Yes, I give a lot of stuff. But then I also decided that for me some time ago that I needed stuff back. I struggled to receive. Yes.

And I find in particular, like school moms. I wanted to be part of a community. I wanted my kids to be a part of a community. So I put them in a Catholic school and I thought it was going to be great. Yes. And I decided to be the hospitality mom, because I needed that extension.

I'd have a big family network. Yes, it's non existent. So when I was organizing, everyone was coming yes to the events and I said, I'll keep it going. Keep it going this year. I'm not doing it and it's like everyone's gone and done their own thing. So you like they didn't appreciate what you do because they don't even value And bringing you asking you to their events.

No. Right? Okay, so let's break this down then. So you have a feeling that you don't really have any family around and you want to create a family. So you create an event to invite the people around you, parents or mothers. Yeah.

And then they come. And then when you no longer do it, it's like you didn't exist. So it's like, you've been taken for granted. And that's my entire Friendship Circle. If I don't organize stuff, it's like crickets. There's no one around.

Yeah. So let's pull this apart. So you get used. Yeah, that's how I feel. And the messages have been there. How long had you been doing these events?

And how long have you been inviting people? How many years have you done it all? period of time. Well, let's see. It's kind of my entire Friendship Circle. I mean, every roll on the door and stuff, like 1520 plus years, okay?

You've been doing this for 15 to 20 plus years. So the universe is talking to you, Andrea. It's talking to because you keep doing the same old, same old and it keeps responding that the same old same old and there is it talks to you. So what it says if we go inside Andrea, she says that I will keep giving when people just take I will keep doing that. I won't require someone else to give back to me. I'm not worth it.

I'm just grateful enough that they show up because my value of myself is low. Yeah, but then I go through a stage where I say fuck all of you. And then my then I'm lonely because then yeah, you I kept myself off from everything and it's like, Where's the balance? Well, well the balance is not in fuck all of you. Because I'm like you I've been sitting there people can't like be mean to the universe's people. You know, that's not good karma.

So if I'm such a loyal friend and that's it and but you don't require you Oh, come on here you are. You just don't require others the same standards. You do it and do it and do it and then you feel so used to get mad. Instead of going Hang on a minute. Are they reciprocating, and at the first instant, they're not. You should get to the point where you go, I'd rather not have them.

Then have them because then if you keep doing that dance, the universe goes to upset she I got more people I can find more people send the boundaries way. Instead of going thin and give, I'm not going to invite those people back and shut that door so that you got I value when you say no, no, no, I'm not doing it. I value myself not fuck you. No, no, no, no, it's like you know, you got I deserve more and you're and then therefore you go you know what no boundaries and I'm going to shut that door and I'm going to value people that are going to show me that will respond back they will give back it's a give and take. You might find one friend, but they come in your circle, then they end their energy goes inside you. I feel respected and loved.

The universe goes, Oh, I can find some more people like that. And then so because you're vibrating that can they then one more trick trickles in and another one trickles But it takes time because you know you've now got some fuck you but come on those people that comma mad, but you haven't been good comedy you you are bad comedy you? Yes You got honored. Ah, that's what I deserve and you should be doing nothing doing nothing, not 20 years. So the universe has been speaking to you and speaking, but you haven't heard the message. So the message is and if we look in your childhood, you weren't valued where you know.

Yeah. And I never felt valued as a child, I felt overly responsible, which is a role that I learned and then you do, you're responsible for everyone else to bring everyone together. You're still doing the same old dance Yeah. And so that vibration the UI in that jar universe brings us papes and helps you helps you do all that. And I'm really sorry. So that's when you identify, go, oops, here is my pattern.

I'm back doing it again. I'm going to change and that's what we're going to have some plans over today and tomorrow to make sure that at least you have a plan even though you may want to help. Oh my god, you're gonna go No, I'll give them a no and you and it's going to be tough. Because you've been doing for so long. It's getting out of getting out of your comfort zone. So no, no, no party no getting together.

I'm not going to do it. I'm going to sit back and let someone else show that they willing to give and take Does that make sense? 506. Yes. Fun. Give me a hug.

Yeah. Yeah, no worries. All right. Any more dilemmas. Yeah, yeah. We've already been up so let's let's see, but we'll just hold out just get anyone else that hasn't been up for some reason that they keep getting that they want to look at you Oh good.

Okay, come on up. Happy come Tawny This is she she's getting out of your comfort zone when you come up here. You are out of your comfort zone. This is good for you. You deserve to be heard. You deserve the time.

Come on here. Yes. Hello Tani. Nice to see you long time. I know. I know.

So that was so what's been happening and what's your pattern? Okay, my pattern is I want to be successful. Yes. I want to be almost you. Yes. Yeah.

You want to know you want to be used in the best form? Yes. Because I go You know what? Yeah, because I Some people go What do you want to be? You know, you want to be you because you do you better than everybody else? Yeah, you know, they may not tell you.

I could tell you, I could talk you out of it. You are the best version of you. Yes. During forensic training. Okay. Cool.

And that's and that's the career path I want to take. Right. And but I've always wanted to be a healer. Yes. Wanted to be out there and help people. Yes.

And I understand where that's coming from. Yes. Because we've just gone through that. Yeah. But what I'd sit tend to do is I get to a certain point yes. And then I'll do everything in my power to self sabotage.

Yes. And then on best not really at Beckett what how do you mean you get to a point where when it's going really well, and then and then it Oh, what happened? Tell me how you know, Jonathan's well, like everyone stops calling. Yeah, really? Yeah. Really?

What else? Tell me about that. Tell me how it goes when it all goes to that point and then nothing. Well, first, I opened up the shop, get had plastic therapies and things like that. Great. And that was really went really, really well.

After a year and a half. Yes. Awesome. Yeah. profit in first year the whole Reddit account was wrapped. Yep.

And then I got chronic fatigue syndrome, right. And then bang. Well, everything because what you didn't have the energy to go in or Yeah, yeah pretty well could hardly walk. Really? What was that? And when Yeah, that was 2000 2013 really when I had to close the shop.

Really? Yeah. And it was the end of 2013 Yeah. After I wallowed in self pity for a while, yeah. And my daughter became my carer for six months, right? And I was I think, was 4445.

And I remember thinking, I did not live my life to get to this point. Yep. And then I started Googling and stuff like that. Some friends are killing and October. My birthday is in August, October, I signed up for friends as well and weirdly enough, my salary continuance happened to come through So I was able to tie it all up just like cool. universe works.

So then has this sabotage continue to sin? And well then I did a forensic live again in March. Yes. Yes. We had that whole year hearing myself. Yeah, I don't have to give that it.

Yeah, that's awesome. Yay. Yeah. And then after that, yeah, I've got myself better. Yep. I had to rebuild because I literally lost everything.

Wow. Like literally everything. And then I decided 2016 I decided I'm going to go back and I'm going to do what I do. Because I now could walk my talk. So now I knew what I was talking about, because I've actually gone through it. So you want to do your healing?

Yeah. So I had an office with fiscal year 2016. I had an office and was doing clients and Quincy Keeling had a part time job to supplement because you know, starting out from scratch, and then and then nothing. Then he just stopped and then it stopped. So I had to let go of the office. Why did it stop?

What happened? What was it just like some people just stopped calling or what it pretty much was just the clients just went there. Right? Yeah. And you'll get the testimonials of it right. Yeah.

And so you're trying to work at help comm like it's another four. So some sort of course, which is obviously in you. Yeah. comes to sabotage it. So let's take a look at this. Yeah.

We got to work this one out. Yeah. And this is why the universe talks to you, or tells you in the way when I say it talks to you, it tells you what's inside. That's really what it's doing. It's saying okay, there's a block inside tiny. Well, you got to work out this block.

Have you worked it out? I would have been talking about it today. And it seems to think that I have this overall responsibility for others. Want to look after everybody, but it's almost to the point where I'm actually making sure that my, my places free, in case anybody needs me. So I'm not actually sort of stepping out doing my thing because what if someone needs me? Right?

Yeah, what if they need so then you will be too busy. So we say exactly. So tell me about your childhood. So this will go back to this patent child. So tell me about that. Tell me tell me the most let me go 1514 1312 1110 989 10 nine.

Tell me about to age nine. Um, I don't really remember much of age. No. Okay. But I know that I was already looking after my younger siblings. Okay, so you're a young child already in charge of siblings?

Yeah. had been for a few years. And do you find that you still help them as an adult? Um, no, not so much. Now when I got the chronic fatigue syndrome that turned them back. All right.

So then you go, all that everything I've done for you and now look at you don't even help me. So You think they're not? Yeah. That's it. So you're starting to see now. That's the sort of same story as yours, wasn't it that you give?

And just because then also you've been told to take care of family no matter what, even if they don't give back. Yeah. And you've got to break this identity that you are responsible for others. So the chronic fatigue is kind of like shifting Yoda was my dark night of the soul. The Chronic Fatigue is a reflection that you had given all your energy, yeah, to other people without anything coming back. Because Chronic Fatigue is all symbolic of I've given up but nothing's coming in some depleted.

Yeah. Lost lost the joy of life. Yeah, yeah. And a lot of work to clear all that. So then after that, let's talk about this. Who you giving to when you've decided or who are you feeling obligated to do you have kids, I have one drawer All right.

Do you feel obligated to her? Yes. Right. And how is she going? Um, okay. To make yourself available for her always.

Right. So, and here we go. So we drop anything for her. She has two little ones. Okay. So the hearing you write your patent is done don't don't get successful because she happens to need me.

I need to be able to be there. And my mom's still alive too. And she's still the same. And you still help her? Yeah, yeah. She's, you know, she quite often will ask, you know, I haven't seen you with this.

And then you go and help them. Yeah, yeah. Oh, there you go. You've kind of answered your own question. So it's saying, well hang on a minute before I give is this a give and take and also, I gotta acknowledge my feelings. And because they could, you're not the only person that can help them and you want to make it that you are the only person that can help them.

Peakers your identity has become I'm important because I can help people help my family. That is how you place yourself worth. That's what you were taught in childhood. I'm only worth something by taking care of I've got worth I've got day they need me. Well, they don't need me all the time. I need clients.

I need that consistency. That's what I'm looking at your blog. You hear me? Are you hearing me? What? What is your book?

Not hearing you. She's not hearing me. Yeah, universe has been talking to her. How long have you been helping your family for how many years? I was six when I took on? How did you say you are?

I'm 5050 I'm fabulous. Y'all sell 34 years. She has been your agency that's been your identity. So what I'm saying is your identity is higher to help your your importance and your is to help others as opposed to be having a job and doing what you love. That's more important. Your your energy is showing that's more important.

You might be you're speaking but you're not feeling Oh, hang on. Did I tell you in here says my family and everybody is more important but the words you say are only words you actually would drop can't see you if you someone rang up there in a crisis you would go to your soccer cancel my bookings and you'd go help them those your daughter particularly when you Yeah, which you can say should cancel clients and go help but Dora Well, not always. Not always. Yeah, probably if you didn't have, you know, as it's getting better now because you know, she's got a boyfriend now. So, so he does some, but you see you are energetically you're not changed. You haven't done that work.

Right? You energetically are still poor whether there's a boyfriend there or not. Yeah, you have not changed because you will Not this is the this is the clue when I have someone like you, I go for one month, you wanna responsibility detox, you are responsible and you will help nobody for entire month you will say no to every single person. What am I gonna do? Well, you could go help some get some paying clients. Okay, so I can help people that way.

Yeah, I could get paid for it. Yeah. Okay. And if you're stored calls and she pays you, you can help her. And if your mother calls and wants errands and help and she pays you you can win a favor paid you win. Well, no, I don't I don't have to.

But so let's Okay, let's get on and otherwise, let's get a pot. If we look at a barrel, one day of how much they've given you, and how much you've given them. How's it looking on the scales? Where are we are we everything you have given them and everything they've given to you. What does it look like? Is it like this?

Or is it like this? Yeah, like what? Show me. So what's this one? This one is how much you've given. So that like gets higher if you've given them loads and this is the amount of high that they've given you.

Well, together combined No, no, no. What No. Do you mom and then do your daughter not divide? That's like, that's like 2121 No, no, no. My mom hammered. Yeah.

Yeah. And daughter is a little bit higher. Right? But she was my carer for six months. So besides that, those only cuz that's only because chronic is took that away. How much Has she helped you?

I should probably be equal. Right? So it's out of balance. Yeah. Okay. So that's the answer.

Now, let me see if he heard me. Let's see, you can speak but let me see if she got it. Tawny Yes. Why do you think you get blocked when you try and get success? Because I'm not putting my needs first. That's one.

Because I'm too focused on being there for others. Yes. Free? Yes. Free like, yeah, for free. Yeah.

You could send them a little list of the prices is in my pricing? Because that's you, that's been your identity since I guess that's your identity. You got to change your identity. How hard is it to change an identity? That's really hard it is. But you know what, that's when you get out of the comfort zone.

That's the struggle. And that's like, say, if you are willing to cancel clients, when your daughter rings for something, then that's telling me Well, you know, I don't know I'm not cancel Clients but maybe reschedule? what it is like she needs me again. So can you see what she's saying? So can you kick her ass later? You need to pair up?

No, but you asked me a question. Okay, and I go, so let's look at it like this. If you want to stay like that the universe will make sure they need you. They will create scenarios that your family have to call you. And then in so you so you have to be available. And then in the back of your mind, you're going I should be available for them.

So make sure you don't get too busy so that if they do call, you can't drop everything, and you're so committed. So the universe says, No worries. That's what's inside there Tawny no worries done. I will top cap where you can be successful. And in fact, if you become too successful I will take it away from so that you can be available to your family and so that you can keep your identity that I'm responsible to my family capiche Yeah, yeah, yeah, we change this side that is what you've got to see. If you want success, it's up to you.

I don't know if you want success. Yeah, no, I do. Do you? Yeah, do right. Yeah, I do. And when I think about it, I was taking public transport myself so so you've got so you know, really it's not gonna hurt.

That's okay. It's good. But the thing is, that change your identity, and preparing them to be able to solve their own problems and not you to be the problem solver makes them empowered for life. We're not here to argue I want to be you when you when you go keep on solving you're you're helping your children you don't impel them to go be a problem solver you go I will solve your problems. You He didn't know it's like you. You're kept in a job.

You love it. Yeah, you love it. I know what's gonna go. And there you go, but I'm just making my point. Does everyone see the point here? She loves it.

Wow. Okay, okay, so anyway, this is what I want you to do. You're going to do this exercise right now. All right, Tony Thank you. Right so if you look at you exercise 11 and look at the table says your obstacle your problem or your blog, example your tightness, your wealth Otani, it was the block on success that would be hers. And then we had That's right, you had other people appreciating you.

So you write it down. And then you need to say, What are you learning in your pattern? So Todd is learning that her identity, she loves it. She goes, actually I do like because that is making me feel good, because that's her identity. So she has to see she actually doesn't value herself. She prefers to give herself away free.

I prefer to value myself it's up to you. You know, I just say to myself, I prefer to make sure there's an exchange because then the universe because I'm looking at the universal law, if I didn't get people valuing what I do and returning it, I'm giving the wrong message. And I'll So I feel drained, and also will block my success. So I'm looking I'm just getting you to, to use the science of universal laws that says, What is the universe message to you. So universe is telling you, you know, I will keep creating these situations so that you keep helping your family. So make sure you don't get too successful.

You got to see why you keep, you got to understand your pattern. Then it says, What is your action plan, and then roleplay your response. So I'm going to get you to do write down one block, fill it out, and then in 10 minutes, we're going to do a roleplay of how you will respond differently.