What are who rules your life? Now? I want you to think about that for a minute something rules your life. Something is really your boss. What is that? Is it an impulse is an activity is that?

Is it a spiritual area or religious area of your life? Is it a group, maybe your family, but what is it that controls you? Well, let me tell you a story. Some years ago, I was on a plane. And sitting next to a very sharp, young woman. She was a Harvard MBA and had a law degree was in a very prestigious law firm.

And she asked me what I did. And I said, Well, I work as executive life coach, and a speaker and a writer and she goes, Well, what do you communicate and teach on and I said, Well, I help people make a life. Not just Just a living, I helped them develop their personal leadership. And she goes, Well, I could use some help there. What do you teach? And I took out my card.

And on the back of my card, I had 10 core principles. I teach in another course, called maximizers, that reflect what I consider a lifetime operating system a way for people to live. And they include things like make things happen, and achieve personal significance. To x out the negatives, have a great attitude, internalize right principles, March to a mission, be a purpose driven person, and so on. And every time I went through one, she goes, Oh, I need that one. I said, Well, me too.

And then we do another one. She goes, I need that one. And I'd say me too. And then she would go through another one. She goes, I need that one. And I'd say, Well, let me do.

And finally we got to the place where she goes, I need all of these. I said, want me to their principles. So by definition, they're all needed to live a coherent dynamic, authentically successful life. And she goes, well, what's the most important one? I said, Well, they're all critical. But I said, frankly, The taproot one is one called energize internally.

And it's about getting centered. It's really about this entire topic. And I would say this is the most important one of all the the issues we've been addressing around this discussion about overcoming and conquering stress. So she said, Well, so what is that one? I said, Well, I saw I moved her glass. And I took her napkin, and I drew a circle.

And on that circle, I said, This Is Your Life. And I said, in your life, I put a little chair, I said, there's a chair or a throne, and something's on the throne of your life. And energizing internally is all about getting the right perspective about who or what should be on the throne of your life. And she goes, Well, that's interesting. I said, Well, so what do you think's on the throne of your life? She goes, Well, I don't know.

I said, Well, is it work? Oh, she goes, I love work, but I don't think so. Is it your family? She goes, Well, no, I like my family, but not that much. I said Isn't money she goes well, I you know, I I like money, but I don't think that's it. We talked about friends we talked about her prestige.

We talked about dating and, and people in our life dates. We talked about all sorts of we've talked about alcohol, we talked about all sorts of things. And she goes, No, I don't think any of those are the boss of my life. And I said, Well, I know what's the boss of your life? And I said, by the way, and another word for bosses Gods She goes, No, I don't believe in God. I said, Well, sure you do.

She was no I don't. I said, Yes. whatever's on the throne of your life is basically your God. It's small G, I'm not saying it's a Mohammed or Buddha or Jesus. I'm saying though, it is your God. It's your boss.

It's the one that's driving you. It's and it's your internal power source. And she goes, Well, that's interesting. So I said, She goes, I don't know what it is. So you say you know what it is? She said, Tell me and I I said, well, you're your own God.

If you don't know, then you're making all the decisions and you're the ultimate decision maker. And she goes, Well, that sounds right. And that sounds good to me. I said, not so good. And she goes, What do you mean? I said, look at you're a bright, articulate, engaging person.

You're much smarter than me, I'm sure. But I wouldn't want you to be my god or my boss, in that full sense. And, and frankly, beyond that, you're a caring person, you seem to have great character. I'm sure you're better than I am. I'm not so hot. But I don't think you have the quality of character that I would want to totally trust to be my boss, my God in that sense.

And I said, Please don't be offended. If I were you. I wouldn't want me to be your God, I become my god way too often. And I screw up and mess up. And that's just not a healthy thing for me to do. So I've learned I need a greater source than that.

So she said, Well, what's your source and then we got into a whole discussion about my life and about her life. And I said, I'm not here to, by all means tell you as a coach who or what you're going to be, but what I am here to tell you is, that's the most important decision you will ever make in your life. And my contention, by the way is that's exactly true of you. You need to decide who or what's going to be the boss of your life, who's gonna be the one that helps you pull your life together and live the kind of life that you want to live. So in this session, what I want you to do is think about that all I want you to think about is who or what is on the throne of your life. That you want the culture to find success, what does it talk about?

Typically, power, prosperity, position, prestige, and pleasure. Those are the big five. And my contention to you, by the way is if you're, if you're a boss, or your God, your center, what's on the center of your life, if it's just about power, or money, or prestige, or pleasure, or any of those elements. They're wonderful things I hope you have Because they can be used for good and they can be used joyously for you and your family and friends but life so much more than that. I've interviewed thousands of leaders around the world, I always ask him the same exit question and that is at the end of your life, how you know, you've succeeded. None of them say those things.

They say things like, How did my kids turn out? What kind of relationship that I have with my spouse? Did I live a life that was dynamic and powerful and influential, and value added? Did I make a difference in my world, that I live a very life mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually, that I win holistically. It came down to two things. Did I live a rich, full life number one, holistically in all areas of my life And then secondly, did I live a life of contribution was my life complete?

Was my life one of contribution that I give back? contribution? Did I live a life where I won and all vital areas of my life So what I want you to think about is who or what is your God and let me suggest, it shouldn't be you. And it should be something or someone you absolutely trust, I made that decision for me. I start with God at the center of my life, that's profoundly important. And that's a decision I made when I was a teenager that's been transformative for me my entire life.

But you need to decide what or who's going to be your your God or your boss. So you can get centered around that, that really becomes a core to everything else. So I want you to noodle on that between now and the next session and draw a circle in the circle, put a little chair right in the middle of throne. And just think, meditate, pray if you're given to that kind of thing. ruminate, talk to others, but say, what is on the throne of my life, and then start to ask what should be on the throne of my life. I want you to understand that because that's going to be your power source that's going to be the transformative thing in your life.

And I want you to get from here to there. So get at it. Go to work, your assignments to do your circle and throne and figure out what ought to be and what is on the throne of your life and what kind of adjustments you need to make and then we'll talk further in the next session about how you start to make those changes.