Mini meat is amazing at making meaning mini me can take the smallest little experience the smallest and make a meaning of that instance. extrapolate into something that is very personal and very painful. This is one of the major reasons that we feel compelled towards anger. When somebody does something, we make meaning of it. And many me in particular for people who suffer from anger makes the meaning that is very personal. It's very deliberate.
It's very hurtful from somebody else's. What have you done to me perspective? So one of my clients used to get really angry with his kids when they wouldn't turn the lights off. When I spoke to him about the meaning that he was making about this anger, he said it's they're disrespectful. They don't respect me that on on me. They don't pay attention to me.
They don't listen to me. They treat me like I'm nothing they treat me like I'm not Important, and they treat me like money grows on trees. Let's be honest, the kids just forget to turn the lights off because their minds occupied elsewhere while they run screaming through the heart. It's got nothing to do with him. They don't turn the lights off. But for him, the story becomes very personal because he takes the slim sliver of what's actually going on, the lights are being turned off, and turns it into something really personal.
People who suffer from anger, this is one of the major things that mini me is doing for you that is really igniting your rage. And that is not seeing when something has absolutely nothing to do with them. It's just an experience. It's just an incident. It's not about them. It doesn't.
It's not about just honoring them. It's not about deliberately abusing them. It's not about deliberately ignoring them or bringing rage to them. It's just that other people don't have the same rules as you. They don't have the same impulses or in purchases or values or needs to do certain things as you do. And so this anger that comes up is the feeling that these things are personal.
But they're not. They're really not. So if you can start to see how many me's making up that story about how those things personal and many me's filling that out and defining in what way this is personal and in what way this is attack against you with to which you must respond with aggression and defense, then you would start to being wise about this mini me and half First of all, actually, and if you will, wise to the fact that it wasn't personal, that the absolutely no reason to respond with anger. So many likes to pretend that everything is about you. Every time somebody cuts you in the traffic, it's not about them driving back if that's about you, how do you walk? Every time somebody doesn't do what you asked him to do?
It's not about them, not paying attention or being lazy or not being capable, that's about them just missing you and making your instructions meaningless and treating you as though you're unimportant or your instructions are unimportant. Meaning brilliant at making things feel like they're an attack against you because we take things so personally, when we are angry people. Just for a moment, consider what would change for you. If you stopped thinking that everything was about you. If you started to notice that the world has actually got its own agenda, that people are not even considering you at all. That when people behave in the way that they behave that normally drives you crazy and makes you super angry.
It has actually nothing to do with you in the least. What would change for you then?