In this video, we're going to talk about changing generalizations. One of the biggest problems that we have with our language patterns. And the way that we communicate with ourselves and others is that we tend to speak a lot in generalities. And I want to go ahead and walk you through what I mean here. So when it comes to generalizations, right, where you're saying things like, it's the end all be all for everything, right? So statements such as I never do anything, right?

Or everyone always rejects me, right? These types of language patterns, completely kill self confidence, because they automatically assume that every single time, right, you never do anything, right when we know that's not the truth, right? So when you say things like this, your emotional state changes, and then you begin to feel hopeless. And then it's like that all or nothing. It's like, either I'm good all the time, or I'm not good all the time. Right?

I can never do anything, right. So next time that you overgeneralize if you say something to yourself, like, Hey, I never do anything right answer with, you know what, really, I never do anything, right? When in reality, you know this is not true, right? Because there's obviously some things that you do, right. So you need to be able to think about it in that type of manner. When you generalize, you automatically have this stop processing this feeling in your mind that you are just no good.

You don't have any type of self worth self confidence, right? Because ultimately, when you're making these statements, you're saying that everything that you do, and all the time that you do, things are bad, they're negative, so you really need to understand the specificity of it. All right, and think about Okay, what specifically, did I do wrong? Or did I do that didn't turn out well, right? Because you have to get into specific situations because in this situation, you didn't do this well, or in that situation. It didn't work out well, right.

But you can look out Okay, I did this specifically. And that's the reason why instead of generalizing and saying that everything that you do is not no right or wrong, or whatever that may be, right? So when you begin to realize just how much you're generalizing about certain things that you don't do, right, or that, you know, happening to you all the time, supposedly, right? When you begin to realize that it's not necessarily all the time, but in just some certain situations, that you're going to be able to challenge that self talk, right? And change that content of your internal pictures and message. So here's a really good example of kind of the process that you can run through.

So let's say that you're saying everybody always rejects me. Notice the pictures that you make when you say this in your mind, okay? Now ask yourself, how many people are in that picture when you say that? Is it your parents? Is it maybe a ex boyfriend, ex girlfriend, maybe a old friend Maybe a girl that you like that maybe rejected you, or you know, whatever that may be right? And then ask yourself who specifically is rejecting me?

What specific person is it? You know, this girl, this guy, or that person over there, right? Because then you begin to realize Actually, it's just this person, john smith, or Martha or Jamie, whoever is rejecting you, right? So it's just one person typically, because when you're seeing these statements of generalities, right, when everybody and everything, then you're painting the picture of everybody, but when you get specific with it, and you pinpoint, it's just this individual, then it makes it easier for you to understand and know that, you know what, yes, this person did reject me, you know, it is what it is, whatever, you know, I'm going to move on. I know that that's not the case for everybody. It just so happens that you know, her and I or him and I, whatever that may be right.

We're just not me. meant to be together, whatever, right? So by asking yourself these kind of questions, you can go from over generalizing about everything that you do that is wrong, right? to getting to a specific situation, that is unsatisfying. So you can focus in on that, right? pinpoint that, and then change that communication, right?

Change that internal dialogue. Because if you're not able to understand that you're generalizing, and that you can actually change that generalization into something specific by stopping your thought process and pinpoint that out. Right? Then you're going to go into this negative feedback loop, right? And you want to avoid that you want to get specific, you want to get clear, and you want to make sure that you fully understand that it's not all or nothing, right? It's this situation or this person, right?

So definitely wants you to understand the power of this here. If you utilize this and you change your generalizations to become more specific and understand that They're just for a certain situation is not you know an entire end all be all your competence is going to store your self esteem is going to soar and you're going to be able to see things in a more positive light. So that's going to be here for this video and we'll see you on the next one.