This particular video, we're going to begin to explore what your true agenda is. Okay, so what I mean by that. So sometimes when we hold on to things, there's what we call a payoff some advantage or benefit that reinforces the cycle of behavior, and explains why we're struggling to let go. This payoff has high costs, whether to our vitality, our affinity, our self expression, or our sense of performance. Now, if you've been suffering for a really long time, or you've been in a long period of pain, and you can't see a way out of the suffering, I want you to consider that there's a reason you've kept the suffering in place. Consider that the the benefit that you receive, because it's kind of giving you something in exchange for this pain that you're feeling, okay?

You have to be receiving some kind of benefits and otherwise giving up the suffering is complete inconceivable. So if I take an example of my ex husband. He had cheated on me many times. And if I'm really honest, I actually enjoyed being the victim. It was a little bit delicious. It was like wow, poor, sad and lonely Adele, who was wronged by this bad man.

I feel so sorry for you. And I actually got a load of attention and lots of hugs and sympathy. And I felt fairly righteous and justified. And we had a gang of followers. We had team Adel versus team x. The problem is that inside I was still suffering.

But I was more interested in my agenda of getting the attention and being the victim and feeling writers instead of moving on healing and living a happy, peaceful life. I'll give you a little secret, your true agenda will always shine through. The problem for most of us is we have no idea what our true agenda is. We lie to ourselves and we tell ourselves and others that we have good intentions, we would move on if we only cruise. So if you're feeling disempowered in any way, shape or form, you must consider that your true energy is actually running the shark. And it's in place that you're receiving some kind of hidden benefit in return.

If you picked yourself in 10 or 20 years from now, what do you see? Do you actually see the same angry person? You know, do you see yourself healed happy, then you've got to start taking that action now. So there's an exercise in the workbook and I want you to stop the video and take a look at this exercise and do that and begin to speculate what your true agenda could be. What is the impact of your life on having this agenda in play? And what are the things that you're now committed to doing so that you can enhance your life and move on