In this video, let's talk about how to identify and manage anger. Anger is one of the very common workplace and business emotions, we rarely express it in that setting. But that's because it's not professional most of the time in so we have to bottle it up and not expressive which is in other way unhealthy because it's just gonna come out in a different way. It's not going to go away, you're just gonna keep it inside of you and it's going to explode in some other way or, or have another impact. So, first of all, when you feel anger, you have to acknowledge it. And when you acknowledge it, you have to identify what's causing it.

First of all, you have to ask yourself is the cause rational. Sometimes the cause is really not that rational really will help you if you can take a little bit of time and distance from the cause of the anger from the situation. To talk to yourself. Sorry not to not to talk to yourself. Sorry to give yourself some space. And come down, just a little bit of that.

And in in a business setting, that's often very possible because in, let's say something happens to you on the street, you don't always have time to give yourself space and distance to come down. Things are more hectic, in a business environment, things are more controlled, you can always take a break, you can go go go back, you can ask for a little bit of time, that's really possible. So these are the very initial steps to identify and take the immediate steps to put the fire out by giving yourself a little distance in space. Next, you have to think a little bit more deeply about course how to not have this repeat. And first of all, anger often arises because a huge causes unmet expectations. You wanted something you didn't get it.

That got disappointed and you got anger. Okay. So there was a flare up there. Now you have to ask yourself was there a good reason that your expectations weren't met. Okay. Maybe you expected too much, maybe you puts gave somebody too much to do above their skill level above their ability level, above the time that they had to do it, it could be that you have to think war, your expectations reasonable sometimes lowering your expectations.

In actually, next time, the same thing happens, you'll be like, oh, instead of being angry, oh, okay, then it's within my reasonable expectations. The outcome then becomes within your reasonable expectations, and you have no reason to feel angry at all. And you just process the information normally and go about your day. And it's like a non issue. So another thing that can help you is to have a plan B. For example, let's say that you have a client call and you scheduled your whole day around it, and the client flakes, the client doesn't come to you and Okay, you just wasted your A whole day.

And that kind of that's something that can cause a lot of anger unless you give yourself a plan B like you bring along a bunch of other work you have to do so the clan didn't come, no problem because you didn't waste that time at all. You just were able to work on some other things, and the client might have to reschedule and you can do the rescheduling. And then you can still get an equal amount of work done without being angry at all. So sometimes just having a plan B completely helps you even be appreciative that they maybe didn't come to the meeting or something because that just gave you time to do something else that maybe even if even a more interesting thing or a higher priority. So that can even be a good thing sometimes. And then the general rule of thumb is, can you expect less because sometimes expecting less, leaves us less room to be disappointed and less room to be disappointed, makes us less angry on average.

Now here are some solutions for fixing Your causes you always also want to, not always but you often want to ask your trusted sources people who, whose opinion you trusted, so they can give you a perspective. Were you wrong? Are they wrong? What was your thinking reasonable. Also, you want to check for distorted thinking this is maybe you're over imagining the other person's approach or their ability or the importance of what you needed. Sometimes there's just we all we just project in, you know, our minds aren't perfect.

And so sometimes if you really focus on the situation, you can see all this is where things went wrong. Sometimes, the way to solve this is to constructively Express what's wrong to the person who made you angry. And you can then if they're reasonable, you can talk to them about what's the ideal way to move forward so that the same thing doesn't make you angry anymore. And you can see their impact on You which was anger is what they intended because surely they didn't intended. And if they understand that it made you angry or caused you some other problems, they might change their behavior. So that would, that wouldn't happen again.

Or they can work with you to create a situation where both of you can feel content. So you always want to do these kinds of things when you have anger, and they will fix not only the immediate anger points, but also moving forward, you're never going to run into that same issue that caused the anger. So you're going to read anger out of your entire business process almost entirely, you can get it almost entirely out because there's always new situations, but the things that happen again and again and again in your business, they like the 90% of your business. So most of the things repeat and as and as and this is a strategy to put really healthy ways to handle every repeating process in your body. business so that everybody feels good about it. And of course, you always want to problem solve, what's the underlying cause of the anger?

Sometimes it's fixable, like with all these strategies, sometimes it's not really fixable. So if it's not really fixable, then you have to change maybe the people involved or the processes involved or the overall strategy might be wrong. So sometimes if it doesn't, if these things don't work, you have to dig a hole level deeper and see what's really the cause and how can you step away from it.