You've got a skeleton for this eulogy. Now you've got the number one positive thing about this person, you have a few other accomplishments and traits you want to focus on. But now we have to put some meat on the bones and the real meat of any eulogy. And in fact, all good presentations are the stories. And the story is simply you recounting a real conversation with this person, what the situation was how you felt, the circumstances. And what happened.
That's all a story is. So for example, when I delivered the eulogy of my mother, she had passed away at age 75. I wanted to put a spotlight on just what an overwhelmingly positive, upbeat person she was and how positive she was to everyone around her and especially to me, and how that influenced me and I recounted my earliest memories of her just Holding the honor lab, saying Little Timmy, you're just a smartest boy in the whole world. And I would say what about the universe that you would say you're the smartest little boy in the whole universe? And I would say, Well, what about when we would go around and read but she was so unrelentingly positive. She boosted me she boost maybe too much, but she boosted my self esteem.
She gave me a confidence that by the time I ever went to kindergarten or first grade, I felt like I was ready to take over the world. And she was just a positive, positive, happy, smiling person who always found something good to say about me even you know, it turned out I wasn't the smartest boy the entire universe. But according to her, I still was even up to the end. So it was a little store but I can see it. I can visualize it without thinking I'm acting now. Lean forward, and I imagine her holding me in the lab.
That's all a story is. It doesn't have to be funny, although it could be. But what you don't want to do is try to go through a biography. You don't want to talk about where the person went to elementary school or honors in college, this point. That's not important. That's not what people remember.
That's not what they want to talk about. They want about they want to hear about how you connect it at a human level with that person. And that's what you need to put into your eulogy. You need stories that involve real conversations with this person. What they did for you how they made you feel, what were the circumstances, that's what makes a story. It doesn't have to be something worthy of turning it into a movie.
It doesn't have to be funny, although it is funny and does See means spirited anyway, by all means. People are feeling tense, a little laughter can really provide relief at certain points in a eulogy. So don't steer away from humor. If you've got a funny story to tell, but it needs to be authentic, it needs to be real. It can't just be something from a joke book, it needs to be something that really evokes the memory of the person who passed. So here's what I need you to do right now.
You've got to look at your outline, the big strengths, the core things that happened in this person's life. And you need a story for each one of these to make it come alive. To make it memorable. Now, your stories don't have to be 30 minutes long, you might be able to tell a story in a minute. You may have multiple stories, but right now, I want you to brainstorm on stories that really magnify this person's strengths positive Quality. So you don't have to write it all out.
But I do want you to write just a couple of notes that will remind you of the story. So for example, the one I just told about my mother, I had a little outline, when I was giving the eulogy. And I just had a couple sentences. smartest boy and boom, now I could talk about it for a minute. I wasn't reading and memorize anything I just shared an experience. That's what a good eulogy is really about.
It's about sharing experiences you had with the loved one who passed away. So that's your homework right now. I need you to come up with stories. This is the fundamental bedrock of the eulogy.